Saturday, 09 January 2016 06:03

Moving away from Pain


Life can be challenging… but in every challenge there is an opportunity for growth and learning.

Sometimes we find ourselves in situations that are really uncomfortable. Maybe we are in the wrong job or the wrong relationship – are they really wrong though or are these actually our opportunities for growth and empowerment. (Are we using the “wrong” word to describe them?)

When we go to buy a new pair of shoes, we often have to try on many pairs to get just the right fit. Size, colour, style are all taken into consideration and we buy a pair that we think are perfect for us and we reject a pair that is not the right fit. But have you ever bought a pair of shoes and after the first time you wear them, you know that you made a mistake? They are uncomfortable, painful or simply don’t fit well after all. What do you do? Do you continue to wear them even if they hurt you or give you blisters? Do you continue to wear them despite the pain because they were expensive and you want your money’s worth from them?

So what happens when you find yourself in a job you hate even though you thought it would be perfect? Do you stay or do you leave? If you have abusive co-workers… can you accept that day after day? Do you just put up with it and allow them to treat you badly?

In a relationship with a partner who hurts or abuses you? Do you put up with that because you have a ring on your finger or share a home together? Or perhaps you have children together and you want to stay together as a family… (maybe you had a dream that you would be the perfect family!)… but what message does that send your children? What are you teaching them for their future… that they should stay in an abusive relationship? That one parent should talk to another like they are a piece of crap on the floor?

In your home life… are you living with people who abuse or disrespect you? Are you living in an area or town which is dead end and in which you are unhappy?

What holds you there in all of these situations? Is it lack of money/energy?

Why is it that we find it so difficult to remove ourselves from situations, people and places that cause us great pain on all levels? Could it be that a part of us refuses to look into our own discomfort? Maybe we think, it’s all a case of semantics or how we choose to view things. Maybe we actually believe “that we made our bed and we must now lie in it”! Maybe we love making excuses to ourselves about why things are the way they are… or

Is it that we don’t love ourselves enough to move away from pain and into happiness?

How bad does it have to get until we are willing to make that move? How bad is bad? (If it’s bad enough to be speaking to your friends or healer about, it’s probably worth looking at and not ignoring).

People have said to me (in healing sessions), “that if he/she doesn’t change soon and start treating me better then I’m going to leave” – but five years later they are still there copping the same abuse. They didn’t leave and they’re still waiting for the change to come. They don’t love their partners and the truth is that they don’t love themselves either. If they did, they would not do this to themselves. And five years has passed them by!

If your child was being treated badly by “a friend” you, as a loving parent, would not allow that behaviour to continue. You would step in to protect your child and to tell the friend that this was unacceptable behaviour. You would not continue to allow your child to play with that friend and you would not invite them to your home. You love your child – of course you are going to protect and care for them.

Is there anything at all that would prevent you from trying to make sure that your child was happy in life?

And so… why do you allow yourself to be unhappy day after day? Who will step in and help you? If you won’t make the necessary changes, who will?

What are you waiting for…? Step forwards and Embrace Life!


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