Wednesday, 20 April 2016 14:27

From Chaos to Grace

Becoming Conscious Newsletter for April 2016

To listen to the audio version of this newsletter please click here

Life can be something of a balancing act. Inner balance, peace and harmony would be a wonderful place to reside on a day-to-day basis. From this place we might expect abundance, joy, wisdom and love to be present and that together this might all contribute to overall health of our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual bodies. This is completely achievable. Approached in the correct manner everyone is capable of this, nay we are designed for this, this is what it would look like – “as God intended”. Unfortunately, many of us are out of balance and have come a long way away from this. It is time to address this now…

When we come here to have this life experience in this physical body suit that we call “human”, of course, most of us are lost in a kind of amnesia. We have no “guide book to living consciously” and we do our best to stumble through and be a good person. Some do not even try to be a good person of course, but that’s another story and we’re not going there today (thank goodness!).

For those of us who are Truth Seekers, we are apt to explore our surroundings and we have been working for quite some time to uncover and explore earth’s hidden history. We have seen the dark side of what exists here and we have accessed the deepest recesses of our mind and body to retrieve personal cellular memories, as well as collective and planetary memories and without doubt we have become aware of some awful things and have witnessed some atrocities. Many of these atrocities still continue to happen to people to this day and that is truly so horrific that we struggle to wrap our heads around “how” someone could do this…? We are consistently shocked by what we see on the news on TV and in newspapers (or Facebook) and we ask how humans can do this? We have discussed many times this inhumane behaviour and where it stems from.

To some degree we can accurately say that we have reached full extension with what we are able to witness without ourselves being plunged into deep despair over what we have seen and now it is time to pull back – not into a state of denial or ignorance but correcting ourselves to a neutral and empowered state from, perhaps, what has been for some of us a stressed or overwhelmed state. We can only take so much and it is very individual as to how much is enough and how much is too much. We have been “God’s witness” here. We have held compassionate space for those who have been harmed and we still will because we know and we can’t un-know the suffering that exists but it is time now to tip the scales back a little in the other direction until we find our balance again. Living in a constant state of stress and imbalance can have devastating effects upon our physical body and energy field, so we need to pay attention to that and strike a counter-pose to find harmony again. We need to take some time to look honestly at the things that stress us, make a note and then correct that. Life then, is a bit like walking across a very long suspension bridge… in order to keep our balance, we need the skill of perpetual adjustment to the external forces that are all around us and that affect us.

How we individually perceive things has an effect on us that might not affect somebody else in the same way, for example:

  • Do you feel that somebody has come to deliberately shake your bridge so that it wobbles fiercely and scares you – do you take things personally? Are you feeling like a victim? Or did the wind just blow and it is nothing personal at all, in fact it is something you hardly noticed!
  • Do you find it easy to just accept that things happen as they do? Or do you need to dig for details until you are exhausted – how do you adjust to counterbalance that?
  • When something disturbs you, can you move yourself away from it or are you stuck there, startled like a deer in the headlights?
  • Do you think that we should walk quickly across this bridge and not think too much and just get it over with or should we tread lightly and carefully adjusting our posture to create the counterbalance? Do we need to make rash decisions or can we allow time to feel into what needs to be done to find equilibrium?
  • Is soft and fluid better or is strong and rigid better? Should we offload some baggage before we attempt to cross? Are we feeling heavy or light? Do we need to let something go…?
  • Is there anything in your life right now that you can identify that is stressing you and wearing you down?

When we take the time to ask ourselves these types of questions, we can gain an understanding of ourselves and we can begin to become more aware of what “in balance” and “out of balance” really feels like. We could think of it as an early warning system towards long-term health.

Strong Astrological Influences

On April 19th, we entered the galactic zodiac sign of Aries. This represents the fire element of purification and is the first sign in a new galactic cycle, so we are beginning again having come to completion with the old cycle. When we look at our personal lives we might see this completion of something we were previously engaged with and signs of something new that we are beginning. Perhaps that is a new state of being or a new level of awareness…

Several other astrological alignments are also geared up to offer us the opportunity for radical transformation and evolution or radical endings that create space for new beginnings. If you are feeling this in your life right now, then definitely there is support in the heavens for you although as we all know some endings are painful and difficult even if they are necessary. Actually, too many planets to mention individually are aligned at the moment, with five about to go retrograde at almost the same time, and they are all supporting us towards finding truth, clarity, trusting our intuition as well as blending our unconscious and conscious so that what lies hidden can now be seen. We may wonder why we could never see these things before? What spell we were under that kept us from seeing this Truth? Well, all is revealing now and as we begin to pull at the loose threads of this fabric (story) woven, now, it is all beginning to unravel…

Eris (a dward planet only discovered in 2005 and coming around once every 558 years*) the Goddess of discord, suffering and chaos is making her presence felt. Actually we can see that her energy has had an influence upon us for some time already as she was approaching. Conjunct the planet Uranus – revolution. Conjunct the sun that comes around every once in a while – a time of conflict, disharmony, discord and disagreement in a powerful emotional angry way. The mythology of Eris is very interesting and connected to the Trojan War and the trickery of the Trojan horse. (You can read it here

We may be feeling this discord right now: whom can we trust; who is the fairest of them all?

If we have any unresolved feelings of injustice, separation or victimisation the arrival of Eris on the scene could easily trigger us to feel that deep pain and hurt all over again. After all, she was excluded from the party due to her discordance, alleged angry outbursts and love of chaos, according to mythology anyway and for those of us who have experienced separation or victimisation in this lifetime, a deep wound could have been triggered as we search yet again to find out where we belong and why we were not invited or not wanted at that party. Why do they misunderstand us so?

Full moon in Scorpio brings a lot of intense feelings and emotions, particularly for those of us with this moon in our chart and full moons are also commonly a time when secrets can be revealed, particularly when in Scorpio. This would be deeply buried secrets (or hurts), things that have been held for a very long time and these can come to the surface now and be revealed so that we can move on. Some of these are personal revelations upon our healing journey, not all need to be shared publicly.

An intense and emotional month indeed and likely to be triggering things connected with our freedom, speaking our truth, our originality, our right to express ourselves authentically and our achievements in life versus the safety and security of “standing down” and accepting the status quo as it is presented to us, being quiet and perhaps not even being seen. In other words “don’t rock the boat”.

It’s a time of decision making and for those of us who are Truth Seekers we might be feeling really pushed right now – to reveal all or to not? That is the question. However…

From April 17th until June 29th we also have Mars in retrograde.

When Mars is in retrograde it is worth remembering that it is a time that can deplete our energy so whomever initiates the action, is the person who will most likely lose – an argument will come back to haunt you, a new venture may fizzle and go nowhere, a new relationship may be hard to get off the ground for lack of vitality. Eris may be pushing us for that completion piece but with this timing, it may in fact be destined to collapse into chaos. Right now, it is better to spend our time going inward and think and feel before acting. This may create heat in our body, a burning off of old emotions like anger and feelings of injustice – a feeling of burning inside. We might feel like a pressure cooker about to explode but it’s imperative that we keep our cool and don’t make any rash decisions. Watch our tempers, hold our tongue. Now is the time to stop the fighting that could cause irreparable damage and take time to sit quietly. This is not a good time to act rashly with ego demands. Everything may be pushing us to act, but we should hold back for a while, take a breath until we can find that inner balance once again. That inner stability will make us stronger when it is time to speak up. The good side of this is that this will bring clarity. We need to take the time now to weigh things up and see what will be beneficial in the long term. When things are out of balance they get very wobbly – sometimes things collapse and fall apart – sometimes WE collapse and fall apart but when we take time to go inwards, we can pretty soon again address this imbalance and come back to centre. When we are pushed to extremes, our strength is in our centre not on the outsides. This is a time to act with grace and poise.

It was not my intention to make this an astrology report, however the intensity of these planetary alignments could be overlooked at our peril. The moon nodes signify the destiny of the soul from past lives to future soul intention and as Saturn squares these nodes we can see that decisions made now can affect the destiny of the soul. This alignment comes about once every 14 years so it is a very important time in our life. We are at a crossroads – a critical turning point. What were YOU doing 14 years ago and how did that affect where you find yourself today?

(Looking back: Myself personally, 14 years ago I was in the midst of a spiritual awakening process that broke my body down through intense kundalini activation – the internal fire of purification. It opened my senses enabling me to see the technology of the lightbody and have a real and personal experience of the quantum field in which healing can occur).

So ultimately, this is all about Truth. Being truthful with yourself, with life and with others. Are you living in Truth or is there a mis-alignment?

At this time, we might find ourselves back at the beginning again. There may be a feeling of having been here before, the difference is that this time we are picking up the extra pieces that we didn’t understand the first time around. As we travelled through life in these last 14 years or so we have been journeying to find our Truth. We have participated with things along the way that we learned a great deal from and these things have all contributed to build us into who we are today. We each have a wealth of knowledge and experience within us and we should honour and respect our individual journeys. No one person is better than us, they may know more things in some certain area of life but that doesn’t make them better than us. Is any one drop of water in the ocean any better than another? With all the energies of chaos and confusion around us, there is no better time to take a breath and come back into our centre and meet ourselves again.

A State of Balance and Grace

Purification of the negative ego can be a long process for many of us. When we are triggered by some external force we may instinctively want to fight back and defend ourselves, our behaviours and the choices we made. When we feel vulnerable our old emotional wounds can rear their heads and we can unconsciously revert to old behaviour patterns. Sometimes our behaviours can appear almost quite primitive especially when we become extremely anxious and stressed and our body goes into a state of fright and flight. Many people live constantly in this state with no idea that this is what is actually going on internally and this sets up a potential for dis-eased states to be created within the body. Many people live constantly in a state of fear and negativity.

When we are able to let go of our ego or lower mind and enter our higher mind, perhaps through states of meditation or relaxation, we begin to view the world from a difference place. We become much more neutral and compassionate in our outlook. We become less judgemental and we are more easily able to access feelings of joy and peace. The more we are able to access this higher mind space and the longer that we are able to hold these higher vibrational feelings in our body, so we are also holding the potential for healing to occur within our body. This could be said to be a state of Grace. Grace emerges in us through our own inner work and healing the dark places within us. Through prayer or meditation and recognising that we thrive on truth but that fear pulls us down. Grace comes to us when we recognise that it is a state of Being that we intend for ourselves – we learn to rely on it, it has a quality and a feeling to it that we could almost recognise as life itself. To live in a state of Grace – what beauty is in that?

Even though the world can seem to be filled with chaos and negativity, we can actually choose to live our lives in a way that allows us to hold these higher vibrations within our body for longer and longer periods of time. It may not be our natural state initially but we can train ourselves to this and remind ourselves over and over again until it becomes second nature to us. When we are out of balance we must remind ourselves to return to this place. We return to inner balance and we return to a state of Grace and eventually this state of Grace takes hold. Some call this Love. In this State of Grace we can release the need to control and the need to know. We can enter the Universal Field, the Quantum Field of infinite possibilities where the opportunity for all healing exists.

And so, until next time, stay in Truth, stay in balance and live with a feeling of love in your heart.

I’ll leave you with this Prayer by Rev Jim Cotter. (below)




God be in my head and in my understanding.

God be in my eyes and in my looking.

God be in my mouth and in my speaking.

God be in my tongue and in my tasting.

God be in my lips and in my greeting.

God be in my nose and in my smelling/inhaling.

God be in my ears and in my hearing.

God be in my neck and in my humbling.

God be in my shoulders and in my bearing.

God be in my back and in my standing.

God be in my arms and in my reaching/receiving.

God be in my hands and in my working.

God be in my legs and in my walking.

God be in my feet and in my grounding.

God be in my knees and in my relating.

God be in my gut and in my feeling.

God be in my bowels and in my forgiving.

God be in my loins and in my swiving.

God be in my lungs and in my breathing.

God be in my heart and in my loving.

God be in my skin and in my touching.

God be in my flesh and in my paining/pining.

God be in my blood and in my living.

God be in my bones and in my dying.

God be at my end and at my reviving.”

~ Rev. Jim Cotter


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